Vodka Fruitcake
Ingredients
Instructions
- First, sample the vodka to check for freshness.
- Take a large bowl.
- Check the vodka again to be sure it is of the highest quality.
- Pour 1 level cup of the vodka and drink it.
- Repeat.
- Repeat again.
- Turn on the electric mixer; beat 1 cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.
- Add water, eggs, and 1-tsp.
- sugar and beat again.
- Make shurr the vodca is still OK.
- Cry another tup.
- Turn off mixers.
- Chuck in the cup of dried fruitt or something.
- Mix on the turner.
- If the fried druit!
- g!
- ets struck on the beaterers, pry it loose with a drewscriver.
- Sample the vodka to check for tonsistancity.
- Next, sniff two cups of salt.
- Or something.
- Who cares?.
- Check the vodka.
- Now stiff the lemon juice and strain your nuts.
- Add one table.
- Spoon.
- Of suger or something-- Whatever.
- Grease the oven.
- Turn the cake tin 350 degrees.
- Don't forget to beat off the turner.
- Whip the bowl out the window.
- Check the vidka again.
- Go to bed.
- Who the heck likes fruitcake anyway.
Nutrition & Diet Analysis (per serving)
415
kcal
21% DV
Protein
Fat
Carbs
* % Daily Values based on a 2,000 calorie diet (FDA 2020).